Training Fido

I debated taking Lola, our dog, to her last obedience class as I was feeling very tired today. I knew that she'd pass her test, but that I wouldn't be signing her up for the next class, so why bother going? But the thought of Joey seeing his dog in a graduation cap was enough to make me put my laziness aside and make it happen. He would absolutely love it.

We walked into Petsmart and Joey walked right over to the classroom.

"I gonna open da doow fo you guys, k mom?"

"Ok bud.."

I followed behind with Lola and watched as he walked right through the door, his hands on his hips as if he owned the place.

"Hi, I Joey. My doggy is Wowa. She gonna take her test."

He walked over and climbed up onto a stool and sat down. He glanced over to see the other dog in class sitting with his owner.

"Oh! Dats a nice doggy. I weally wike him."

"Thank you, his name is (we'll say)Fido" said the woman.

Class started and Lola passed the first 3 parts within the first minutes of class. She was not trying to, just got lucky while anxiously waiting for me to give her a treat. The dog across from us was not having as easy of a time.

"DOWN FIDO!" the woman firmly said.

The dog did not move.

"FIDO, LAY DOWN!

Her voice was rising and she was instantly frustrated. The old boxer sat comfortably to one side, his eyes barely opened. He was not interested in being there this evening.

"FIDO!!! dang it, you love to lay down. JUST LAY DOWN! FIDO!!!!"

The woman began to shout and pull at the dogs legs in an attempt to get him to slide forward onto his belly. Her face turned bright red as she pulled with all her might. Still, old Fido did not budge.

Joey looked over to me and cocked his head to the side and gave me his disapproving face.

"Dat doggy jut being naughty. He jut not waying down."

"You're right about that. He is being very stubborn tonight," the woman told Joey. Now, she is very flustered, bright red and breaking a sweat. She stands up over the dog and begins to place all of her weight onto the dogs back.

"FIDO, YOU LAY DOWN RIGHT NOW!!!"

Joey sits straight up watching the argument between owner and dog take place and has had enough. He begins to interrupt at the sight of her pushing onto the dog.

"Wait! Dats not how you do it!! You jut say, DOWN and go wike dis wit you fingers(he gives the hand signal for 'lay down' in classic, robotic form) and den he ways down. Wike dis! (he gives the hand signal again) and tew him DOWN and den he wiw jut do it wike Wowa!"

The woman looks up at Joey, her mouth drops open. She seems unsure of what to say or do, but is quickly distracted again by Fido. I look over to see the instructor with the same look on her face. Her head tilted to the side, jaw opened and eyes as big as ever just starring at Joey.

Yes. That is my son. Yes, he just corrected an adult. I am so so sorry. Please forgive him! And also, IF YOU WOULD JUST GIVE THE HAND SIGNAL AND CALMLY TELL FIDO TO LAY DOWN HE WILL PROBABLY DO IT. Of course, I said none of this as my jaw was also dropped open and I was unsure of whether I should be proud or completely humiliated.

Joey was quite irritated at this point, and very clearly unhappy with Fido's behavior. He looked at me again, this time with a shrug of his shoulders and his little chubby hands lifted palm up into the air,

"I don'know ma. He jut not gonna wisten. He jut a naughty, naughty doggy."

The instructor choked on a laugh and asked us to begin the rest of our test, which thankfully had to take place throughout the store.

When we got back to the training room, the instructor congratulated us on helping Lola pass her test. Joey smiled very proudly and patted Lola on the head. He excitedly tried to help place the graduation cap on Lola's furry head and waved her certificate of completion all around. When the graduation cap would no longer stay on Lola, Joey decided he'd just hold her certificate over her head instead.

"You jut my good doggy, Wowa... Mom, I wike habbing a doggy named, Wowa."

And yes, Fido eventually laid down and passed his test also :)